We have attended three weddings
thus far this month. Each wedding followed
a very similar order of events. We
attended only a portion of each. The
events begin with a gathering of the family and friends at the groom’s house at
about 9 in the morning. There is usually
a meal offered, then, at about
10am, all the groom’s family and friends, along with the groom and a truck full
of gifts for the bride, caravan-it to the bride’s house. At the bride’s house the actual marriage ceremony
takes place between the groom and the bride’s father. After which, the groom goes to the bride’s
bedroom to retrieve his wife. There are
usually some words, prayers, or blessings that take place before they come out,
all with as many guests looking on as possible.
The couple then takes their place on a large stage, set up under a tent
usually in the middle of the road. Here
the couple greets all their guests until mid-afternoon, at which point they may
return to the groom’s house to greet additional guests. During the afternoon, the couple usually
takes a small break, if time and guests allow. Afterwards, they change into another outfit, just as fancy, for the
night reception, which usually takes place at about 7:30pm. This reception is similar to the earlier event in which the bride and
groom sit on the stage greeting guests, the guests eat, and someone sings
on another stage.
The first wedding
was of the younger brother of our neighbors whom have been very helpful with Barat
language study. I, Erin, went by myself
as John and Caedmon had soccer practice, and Whitman chose to go to soccer over
the wedding.
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The Bride's family bringing gifts
when they went to the groom's house to greet guests mid-afternoon.
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Bride & Groom
with the groom's parents
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| Erin and our nieghbor |
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The groom's mother presenting the couple with gifts.
The bride is putting her mother-in-law's hand to her forehead in a sign of respect.
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| Our neighbor's daughter, the bride, and Erin |
The second wedding was an employee from the immigration office whom we've made friends with due to our frequent visits. She offered and provided traditional clothes for our family to wear to the wedding. It was a lot of fun to "dress up," but the clothes were not at all breathable. It made me feel sorry for the bride and groom.
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| Getting dressed, with some help from friends of the bride. |
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| Caedmon |
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Erin
The shirt fit perfectly, even around my big belly, and without any pre-measuring!
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| Whitman making friends in the car. |
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| The Wedding Ceremony, inside the bride's house. |
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Sitting on the floor.
After the ceremony, we ate food that was under all the yellow covers.
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| The groom retrieving the bride from her bedroom. |
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| Bride and Groom heading to the stage to greet other guests. |
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| Our family with the bride and groom. |
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| Everyone wanted their picture taken with us. |
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The Bride's Hands
Her hands are drawn on, in a henna type manner, in a special ceremony the night before.
She did have her cell phone with her the whole time as well.
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The third wedding was one of our
original language helpers. This wedding
was the only one of the three which used local Barat customs in the dress and
decorations. To me, a foreigner, they
all looked pretty similar.
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| Guests, just hanging out. |
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| Arrival of the groom, his family, guests, and gifts. |
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| Event tent set up in the middle of the road. |
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Typical formal wear for male guests:
sarong, sport jacket, and traditional hat.
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Our family with the bride and groom.
Our language helper is the bride.
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As for the head covering, I chose to wear one for many small reasons. Mainly though, to be like the people we live among and reduce any future barriers to knowing truth. This was the first time I wore one out in public. I received only a few comments, which all consisted of, "You're wearing a head covering, you look so pretty." Out of the three brides, all wore skin tight head coverings as well (this is pretty rare from our own experience attending weddings). The first bride though, did wear one which was black on top to mimic her hair. All great experiences for culture study and picture taking.
